It has not been a great weight loss month. I struggled with eating while on travel, and while guests were visiting. I have learned that a single day of overindulgence can be difficult to overcome; I have acknowledged that my body is now aware of the reduced caloric intake and in response has become suddenly far more efficient in energy consumption; I am now resigned that in order to achieve my weight loss that there is no other way, really, than to go to bed hungry, sometimes very hungry, every night.
There is also a finality to it: the eating excesses of my youth, which should have ended over 20 years ago for me, have got to come to an end. I cannot order a pizza and simply eat the whole thing anymore. I cannot eat fish and chips and believe that constitutes just one meal, instead of the three (or four, thanks Ireland) that it actually is. I need to measure the spaghetti I cook. I need to eat a great deal of fiber, fruits and vegetables. And I need to disassociate the act of eating from the act of social interaction, even though the two are almost inextricably linked.
It seems clear to me now, that a failure to lose weight is a failure to reckon with the reality of one's body and one's corporeal existence, and a simultaneous failure to appreciate the consequences of not accepting that which cannot be changed.
Nothing there that millions of first-worlders have not endured at some point in their weight loss endeavours. It's just getting very personal for me.
Regarding the chart: I'm so far off the original target that I've added a new target line. July 2nd is now the date.
